Strength

Well, I have really fallen off the wagon the last couple of weeks. I have not been in a good place mentally and that is majorly affecting my eating habits and my working out. I woke up this morning with a snow day and am trying to get a better handle on things. I have an appointment with a personal trainer tonight at 5:15 and am hoping that once I talk to her, I will be more motivated to keep up with all of this. She was also in physical therapy before she got her personal training certificate so I'm hoping she can help me with my ankle and knee issues as well.

One another note, I got to talk to my Godmother on Saturday. I was expressing to her how I felt overwhelmed and I wasn't sure I could handle all of my jobs and grad school and planning the wedding. She stopped me and said, "Wait, what kind of woman are you?...a strong one! You can handle anything." I think I had lost sight of that. I think about when I was working 4 jobs and living with my parents to try and save up to buy a house...or when I worked 2 jobs in college to buy a car...or when I went through the year I got my heart broken, was teaching high school, attended my sister's wedding and my Mom had a heart attack. If I can get through all of that and still be here, I need to remind myself that I AM strong enough to do all of this. I am capable of getting my act together, eating better, working out and completing grad school, wedding planning, art lessons and hopefully switching schools next year. I have to stop being so self-doubting and give myself some credit. I've had a hard time focusing on the positive this year and I need to change that. I own my house, have an amazing and supportive fiance who loves me no matter what I look like and I have a job that at least pays the bills. I am thankful for all of these things. I just have to keep remembering to put things in perspective. Thanks Laura for reminding me of that! Do you have someone who influences you when you need a new outlook? I hope so...