Mind, Body and Soul Manifestations

I realized today that I have less than 30 days before I turn 30 years old. My birthday is October 16th. This means I have approximately 28 days to accomplish some goals that I've been toying with. That just doesn't seem like enough time. I've decided to create a 30 before 31 list instead. Here it goes: 1. Pay for someone's coffee behind me at Starbucks. 2. Send a handwritten note to a friend at least once per month. 3. Brush up on my Spanish. 4. Run a half marathon. 5. Go Camping. 6. Visit a new state. 7. Go to the Georgia O'Keeffe Museum. 8. Finger paint with my nephew. 9. Watch The Passion of the Christ. 10. Go meatless for a week. 11. Take an art class for pleasure, not for teaching. 12. Read "Life in Times of Cholera." 13. Dine at an upscale DC restaurant. 14. Go on a hike. 15. Take a day trip to NYC. 16. Eat at Serendipity. 17. Ride on a Ferris Wheel. 18. Volunteer at the Humane Society. 19. Try stand-up paddleboarding. 20. Learn h...

As most of you probably know by now, Ben is going through some pretty serious health issues. As a result of this, we have decided to postpone our wedding so that he can take some time to heal and we can get married when things slow down a bit. This has all given me a lot of perspective. I have started truly prioritizing. I realized that over the past few years I have gotten so caught up in work and making money and figuring out how to lose weight that I have neglected the things that are truly important. As you've seen me discuss before, mental and emotional health are something that I care deeply about. I realized that I have been neglecting my own mental and emotional health lately. I think I am finally seeing clearly now that I need to spend more time focusing on my family, my blessings, my friends and the things that I enjoy in life rather than trying to change the imperfections. I am starting to understand that I need to let go of some of the control I've tried to have a...

Well, I had my first fitting today and I wish I could say it was perfect and amazing, but I just feel disappointed in myself. I really thought I would be thinner and feel better by now in the dress. Perhaps I have watched too many wedding shows, but everyone talks about having this feeling and just knowing that dress was meant for you...blah, blah, blah. I just don't feel like I've felt that way. I'm trying my best to be excited about wearing the dress, but it's just not happening. It's incredibly frustrating to have these doubts about myself and I don't want my insecurities to ruin the day for me or Ben. I always said that I would just have a small ceremony and then throw a big party. I feel like that's what I'm doing, but the dressing up part just doesn't feel like me. I have admired my beautiful friends and wanted that "bride" feeling. It's just not hitting me. I wish it was easier to see myself through other people's eyes. It...